Unbelievable Gaborone Getaway: Protea Hotel Masa Square Awaits!
Okay, buckle up, buttercups! Because we're diving headfirst into the messy, glorious world of the Protea Hotel Masa Square in Gaborone. Forget the polished brochures – this is the REAL scoop, warts and all, marinated in my own brand of chaotic enthusiasm.
Unbelievable Gaborone Getaway: Protea Hotel Masa Square Awaits! – My Honest Take
Alright, so the promise is "unbelievable." Let's see if the Masa Square can actually deliver. I've got my suitcase (and my inner cynic) packed. Here we go…
First Impressions & Access: Let’s be real, getting there matters. Accessibility is key, and the Masa Square seems to get it. I'm not a wheelchair user, BUT I'd give them kudos for the elevator situation, the facilities for disabled guests that are mentioned, and the general layout. Gives me hope. And, speaking of hope, the Airport transfer is a lifesaver after a long-haul flight. Thank GOD.
Check-in: Speedy or Stressed? The details say 'contactless check-in/out' and 'express check-in/out.' Great! Because after a long flight, you don't want to be standing around like a lost tourist. The front desk is also 24-hours, which is clutch. Hopefully, the "private" check-in/out is an option. I hate crowds.
The Rooms: Where the Magic (Hopefully) Happens
Okay, let's get down to brass tacks. Air conditioning in all rooms? YES. Essential. And they claim to have soundproof rooms. If that's true, I'm already in love. I need my beauty sleep. Free Wi-Fi?? Oh good! And not only is there free Wi-Fi in the rooms (thank the travel gods!), but in the public areas as well. My social media and my work are happy.
What else? Important stuff.
- Free bottled water? Don't have to go hunting for expensive water bottles.
- Coffee/tea maker? Excellent. First thing in the morning is coffee. Sorry, world.
- Alarm clock? For those of us who are not good with time.
I especially like the idea of a laptop workspace. Even if I'm on holiday, I might need to send an email or two. Other perks are: Bathrobes, hair dryer, and slippers. Plus, in-room safe box for valuables and Satellite/cable channels, and the always-important wake-up service.
Then there’s the bathroom situation. Private bathroom, Separate shower/bathtub, Toiletries? Good. Bathtub? Even better. After a long day of exploring, I could use some soaking time with bath salts and bubbles.
Cleanliness & Safety: Are They Serious About This?
I'm a germaphobe. Full stop. So hearing things like Anti-viral cleaning products, Daily disinfection in common areas, Hand sanitizer, Individually-wrapped food options, Professional-grade sanitizing services, Rooms sanitized between stays, Sanitized kitchen and tableware items, Safe dining setup, Sterilizing equipment – it's music to my overly-anxious ears. I need to be confident this hotel is taking it seriously. I'd hope they've doubled down on these things considering all the Covid stuff. And they say – "Staff trained in safety protocol." Good. Very good.
Dining, Drinking, & Snacking: Fueling the Adventure
Now for the good stuff – food! This is where hotels either win or lose me. The Masa Square has a ton of choices. Let's break it down:
- Restaurants: Several, apparently!
- Breakfast [buffet], Asian breakfast, Western breakfast: Buffet AND choice of breakfast? Sign me up. I'm a buffet fanatic, and a sucker for a good fried egg.
- Coffee shop: Essential. For my caffeine addiction.
- Poolside bar: For the sundowner, obviously.
- Bar: Also essential. Happy hour, please!
- Room service [24-hour]: I'm already envisioning late-night snacks.
- Alternative meal arrangement: Good for dietary needs.
- Snack bar: For those mid-afternoon hunger pangs.
- Vegetarian restaurant: Yay for choices!
The Gym/Workout and Wellness: Trying to Be Healthy (Maybe)
Okay, okay, I have to admit it. I try to be that person. The one who hits the gym on vacation. And the Protea Hotel might actually make me do it. The fitness center, a spa, a sauna, a steam room AND an outdoor pool? Fine. I'll try the gym. Maybe. The sauna? Definitely. The pool with a view? I can see myself there, sipping a cocktail. Bliss. Massage? Yes! My tense shoulders are already rejoicing. And let's not forget a foot bath, too.
Things to Do: Exploring Gaborone & Beyond
I don't know if the hotel is perfect for kids or for proposals, but they have a bunch of other stuff.
- Gift/souvenir shop: Because you HAVE to.
- Convenience store: Always a plus.
- Concierge: For insider tips and help navigating the city.
- Cash withdrawal, Currency exchange: Helpful.
- Laundry service, Dry cleaning, and Ironing service - I would LOVE this.
Services & Conveniences: The Little Extras
These little things add up:
- Daily housekeeping, Luggage storage, Safe deposit boxes, Doorman.
- Elevator: I’m not climbing stairs.
- Car park [free of charge], Car park [on-site]: Always a good point.
Getting Around
- Taxi service, Valet parking: I would love this.
- Car power charging station, Bicycle parking: This makes me happy.
- Airport transfer: So helpful.
My Quirky Observation:
I have a weird thing about pillows. I HATE lumpy ones. So if I find a perfect, fluffy, cloud-like pillow at the Masa Square… I'll probably write a sonnet about it.
The Imperfect Truth:
Look, no hotel is perfect. There might be a minor hiccup here and there. Maybe the Wi-Fi drops out for five minutes. Maybe the elevator is a bit slow. Maybe the coffee isn’t quite as strong as I like it. But that's life, right? It's about the overall experience. From the sounds of it, this place strikes a good balance.
The Offer (for the Impulsive Traveler):
Tired of the Same Old? Ditch the Dull – Your UNBELIEVABLE Gaborone Escape Awaits!
Here's why you NEED to book the Protea Hotel Masa Square RIGHT NOW:
- Stress-Free Arrival: Airport transfer? Check. Contactless check-in? Double-check.
- Room Bliss: Imagine this: your own, sparkling haven to relax in after a day of adventure. Then the free Wi-Fi hits.
- Foodie Paradise: Buffets that beckon, bars that beg you to stay, and the 24-hour room service… enough said.
- Chill Out Zones: Spa. Pool. Sauna. Need I say more?
- Safety First (and Always): They're all about cleanliness, which means YOU can relax and enjoy.
But here's the kicker: To sweeten the deal, book your stay in the next week, receive a bonus perk!
Book now, and receive a complimentary cocktail at the poolside bar!
Don't wait. Your unbelievable Gaborone getaway is calling. Book your escape at the Protea Hotel Masa Square NOW!
Disclaimer: I didn't actually experience the hotel. This review is based on the provided information and my own highly subjective opinions and imagined experiences. Always double-check the latest hotel policies and COVID-19 protocols before booking.
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Okay, buckle up, buttercups. We're going to Gaborone, and it's gonna be less "smooth travel brochure" and more "me spilling my guts (and probably some wine) about my trip." Protea Hotel Gaborone Masa Square, here we come. Prepare for glorious chaos.
Protea Hotel Gaborone Masa Square: My Botswana Breakdown (Incomplete Itinerary, Subject to Change Based on a Whim and a Bad Internet Connection)
Day 1: Arrival and the Existential Dread of the Mini-Bar
- Morning (roughly): Arrive at Sir Seretse Khama International Airport (GBE). The air crackles with the promise of adventure, and by "promise," I mean "humidity." Seriously, it felt like I'd walked into a giant, warm hug. Immigration? Surprisingly easy. Probably because I was still riding the high of surviving the transatlantic flight without losing my sanity (or my noise-canceling headphones).
- The Car Rental Debacle: Found my pre booked Car rental, they tried to give me an undesirable car. The car, felt like it had seen better decades. The clutch felt more like I was wrestling a grumpy rhino. Okay, deep breaths. This is what travel memories are made of, right? (I think I need a stiff drink already.)
- Afternoon: Check-in at the Protea Masa Square. The lobby? Clean, modern, almost intimidatingly efficient. The woman at the desk, bless her heart, had the patience of a saint as I fumbled for my wallet and triple-checked the room number. "Room 307…" I repeated it like a mantra, trying to ward off the inevitable (and probably overpriced) mini-bar temptations.
- The Mini-Bar Confrontation: Oh, the mini-bar. The siren song of overpriced snacks and lukewarm beverages. I stood there, staring at those tiny bottles of (doubtlessly) watered-down scotch. "Do I need a drink?" I asked myself. The answer, after a long, hard stare, was a resounding "YES." But not yet. Resist! (Famous last words, I'm sure.)
- Evening: Wandered around Gaborone. First impressions? A vibrant city with a pulse I could feel. The air was thick with the smell of… well, I don't know what, but it was good. Found a restaurant, "The Bull & Bush," for dinner. The food was…fine. Okay, the burger was good. Really good. And the local beer? Fantastic. My first taste of Botswana, and I was already hooked.
Day 2: A Glimpse of the Wild (and a Near-Disaster Involving a Zebra)
- Morning: After a sleep-in-sort-of, I went to Mokolodi Nature Reserve, a 30-minute drive from the city. Wildlife here, a lot of it, and I mean a lot. The giraffes, graceful as ever, seemed to be posing for Instagram (which, let’s be honest, I probably tried to do). The rhinos… well, they looked grumpy. And the zebra… oh, the zebra.
- The Zebra Incident: I was so busy gushing over a baby elephant (seriously, could it be any cuter?) that I didn't see it. The zebra. Right there. Between me and my car. Apparently, zebras don't appreciate being stared at, especially when you're holding a camera. It charged. I yelped. I scrambled. It stopped. We stared at each other for what felt like an eternity. I slowly backed away, heart hammering in my chest, convinced I was about to become a zebra's chew toy. (Note to self: pay more attention to large, striped animals.)
- Afternoon: Recovered from the zebra scare with a long, cool drink (non-alcoholic, this time. Gotta keep the reflexes sharp). Back at the hotel, I just sat for hours at the balcony and watching the city. The hotel felt like a haven after the brush with nature.
- Evening: Another restaurant, "The No. 1 Ladies' Cocktail and Coffee Bar," for dinner. The cocktails? Delicious. The company? My own, but I didn't mind. Sometimes, you just need a good meal and some time to think, or not think, whatever.
Day 3: Culture, Coffee, and Contemplation (and Possibly More Mini-Bar Shenanigans)
- Morning: Visited the National Museum and Art Gallery. I’m usually not the type to spend a lot of time in museums, but I’m glad I did. The exhibition about Botswana’s history and culture was fascinating, making me feel more connected to the place.
- The Coffee Crisis: Found a cute little coffee shop. Ordering a latte was a feat of linguistic acrobatics (my Setswana is… non-existent). The coffee itself? Heaven. So good, I almost forgot about the zebra. Almost.
- Afternoon: Wandered Gaborone. I saw the statue of the three Dikgosi, the founding fathers, in a moment of quiet reflection. I went to the Gaborone Dam. I need to be more grateful for the life that I have. To appreciate the small things. And to maybe buy a slightly less expensive soda from the mini-bar.
- Evening: Back to the hotel. Thinking too much about my life back home. Not in a bad way, just… thinking. The mini-bar beckoned. I considered it. Then I walked away. Tonight, I had found peace. (Tomorrow… well, tomorrow is another story.) I went for a run around the hotel.
Because, let's be honest, this entire trip has been a mix of awe, near-death experiences, and constant internal debates about the merits of room service. But that's the whole point, isn't it? To embrace the mess, the imperfections, the unexpected moments that make life, and travel, so wonderfully, humanly, chaotic.
Future Adventures (Maybe):
- Day trips to other places.
- Learning a phrase or two of Setswana (probably "thank you" and "where is the restroom").
- Avoiding further encounters with large, striped animals.
- Making actual use of the hotel gym (doubtful).
- Successfully resisting the lure of the mini-bar for a full 24 hours. (Highly unlikely).
This is travel, folks. A work in progress. And I wouldn’t have it any other way. Botswana, you’re a wild place. Literally and figuratively. And I'm loving every minute of it, chaos and all.
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Unbelievable Gaborone Getaway: Protea Hotel Masa Square Awaits! (Or, Maybe It Does...)
So, is this Protea Masa Square thing ACTUALLY worth the hype? I'm seeing a LOT of ads...
Okay, deep breath. Hype? Yeah, there's hype. Is it *all* justified? Honestly? Nah. But... here’s the messy truth. I went there, right? Expecting, you know, Instagram perfection – sun-drenched pool, cocktails that practically teleport you to the Maldives. Reality? Well, the pool *was* nice, if a little... enthusiastically used by kids. And the cocktails? My first one arrived looking like a melted snow cone. The second? Undrinkable.
But here’s the thing: Gaborone. It’s not exactly overflowing with options. And Masa Square? It *does* have a certain… energy. A slightly chaotic, slightly charming energy. It's like a slightly tipsy uncle at a family reunion: a bit much, but you can't help but love him. If you're expecting flawless, pristine vacation… lower your expectations. If you want a decent base of operations for exploring Gaborone and experiencing something… alive? Then, yeah, it *could* be. Maybe.
What's the deal with the rooms? Are they clean, or am I signing up for a biohazard zone?
Cleanliness? Okay, this is where I need to put my “Honest Opinion” hat on. The rooms *generally* are clean. Like, not hospital-sterile, you know? But no obvious colonies of… things. I once stayed in a hotel, *worldwide*, that seemed to actively *breed* dust bunnies. This isn't that. The bathroom was… passable. The towels weren't exactly fluffy clouds, but they *did* dry me, which is the main goal, right?
Here's a pro-tip, though: Inspect everything. Especially the corners. And maybe pack some Clorox wipes. Just in case. I always do. I’m a bit of a germaphobe, so I'm not the best judge. The worst thing was the *view*. It was… a parking lot. A BIG parking lot. Seriously, if you get a room facing the parking lot… ask to change. Please.
Is the food any good? Breakfast, lunch, dinner – lay it all on me!
Ah, yes, The Food. Breakfast, included! This is a MAJOR draw. You know I love a buffet. And it was… functional. Omelets made to order (sometimes, depending on how swamped the poor guy was), the usual pastries, a slightly sad selection of fruit. The coffee taste like hotel coffee – which, as we all know, can be a bit of a gamble. Some days, it was fine. Other days, it was… well, let's just say I spent a good chunk of one morning regretting my caffeine choices.
Lunch and dinner? I only ate there once. And it was... a mixed bag. The steak I ordered was actually pretty decent. Medium rare, as requested. The service, though? A bit… slow. Like, "I'm-pretty-sure-the-waiter-forgot-about-me-and-is-now-taking-a-nap" slow. Honestly, there are better places to eat in Gaborone. Explore! Don't eat *every* meal at the hotel. Trust me.
Okay, so you mentioned the pool. Is it actually… usable? and more importantly, is it crowded?
The pool. Ah, the promise of poolside bliss! Yes, it's usable. It's a decent size, and the water *looked* clean. Sunlight reflected so well. But crowded? Oh, yes. Especially on weekends with families. I'm not a huge fan of sharing my relaxation time with screaming children, so I retreated early. Consider yourself warned. There were always kids. Jumping. Screaming. Splashing.
Another tip: if you're looking for a quiet escape, this *might not* be the place. Unless you're a master of tuning out chaos. I admire those people. I am not one of them. I prefer a more serene, poolside experience.
What about the location? Is it easy to get around, or am I doomed to taxi hell?
Location, location, location! Masa Square is, well, in Masa Square. Which is actually a good thing. It's right in the city center. You're surrounded by shops, restaurants, and a casino (if you're feeling lucky… or reckless). Taxis are readily available, and Uber does operate in Gaborone, which is handy. Walking around during the day is generally safe and easy, but I'd advise caution at night, as with any city.
I stumbled upon a craft market near the hotel. It was a complete accident but it turned into a highlight. Picked up some gorgeous, hand-crafted jewelry and chatted with the vendors for hours. That's the good stuff. That's the stuff you'll remember. Not the slightly-underwhelming cocktail.
Did you like anything about it? Tell me something positive!
Okay, okay, I'm not *completely* jaded. Yes, I did like things! The staff were almost universally friendly. Botswana people, in general, have a gracious, welcoming vibe. One guy at the front desk actually remembered my name after the first day. That’s impressive, given how many people must flow through there.
And honestly, the *convenience* can’t be overstated. Being right in the middle of things, with all the amenities at your fingertips? It's a huge plus. Plus, there are good wifi connections. I was able to get all my work done and enjoyed a relaxing vacation at the same time! Okay, fine, I liked it, mostly. Sometimes it was even… enjoyable. Just, temper your expectations, and you'll probably have a decent time.
Would you stay there again?
Mmm… that’s a tough one. Probably. Depending on what’s available, and what I'm looking for. If I wanted a solid base of operations, with easy access to everything, and was willing to forgive the occasional imperfection, then yes, I would. But if I was after pure, unadulterated luxury? Probably not. I'd do some serious research and see what else is on offer.
Also, I keep going back in my mind to the craft market. I’d be back in a heartbeat for the experience. It showed me Gaborone isn’t just hotels and business; it’s people, and culture. So, is Protea Masa Square the *be all and end all* of Gaborone hotels? Absolutely not. But is it a decent place to start an adventure? Maybe. Just… pack some hand sanitizer. And lower your expectations. You'll be fine!
